The Preserve, Monday Night

[bigdamndestiny]

With a girlfriend and an overly large puppy with him, Merlin was on a hunt. Not for rabbits or teal deer, but for these Smurf things. Personally, he still thought they were pixies. They ought to be glad there was no stealing children away, really.

Plus, Arthur couldn't be cross as this was training for Brynn!

"Alright, do you think she has the scent?"

[[For the underwear-less one!]]

Comments

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine -- who was not underwearless, thank you! She just... had less underwear -- looked hopeful. "Well, she stopped trying to lead us back to my underwear drawer, so she must be following something now!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"Sorry about that." Bryn had been... very certain about that being where they ought to go.

[thatsamilkshake]

"Well, she was right; that's where they belong." Francine would just attempt to avoid following the logic path that gets you to dogs know where I keep my underwear. "They're just not there." She trained her flashlight over the grass ahead of them. "I don't see any Smurfs, though."

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Flashlights were so much more useful than a torch. He needed to take one back to Camelot.

"Bryn, where did they go? C'mon gir--" And that would be Merlin being dragged by the dog thatta way.

[thatsamilkshake]

"Whoa, Nelly!" That didn't work, so Francine tried "Whoa, Bryn!" and that didn't work either, so she just followed on their heels. Oh so sneakily, yes. "What did she find?"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"I'm not sure!" Merlin called, trying to dig his heels in. This was the problem with being part stick here.

[thatsamilkshake]

"Wait uuup!"

Oh hey, Francine could help with that! She... was not part stick. No part of her was a stick.

Now, the smart thing to do here would be to grab for the leash to help him hold onto it. Instead of, for instance, his waist.

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Which managed to slow Bryn to a crawl with a bit of wheezing on her part before she flopped down on her butt and whined.

"At least we know she can track?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine did a bit of wheezing too. "Track what though?" She played the light over the bushes.

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"Hopefully your--underthings." Merlin watched as Bryn just flopped over and sniffled in the direction of the bushes. "There?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine crouched down and moved aside some of the branches. "Well, they'll definitely need to be washed ag---- ACK!"

Blue skin! That was blue skin in the beam of her light.

"HA, WE GOT YOU, SMURFS! GIVE ME BACK MY UNDERWEAR NOW!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"Ac! Yeh daftie! Turn aff ye latern!" The tiny, angry man who seemed to be wearing an oddly familiar black and pink fabric for his kilt.

Merlin blinked. "...They really are blue."

[thatsamilkshake]

Yes, yes, they really were blue. More to the point, "HE'S WEARING MY UNDERWEAR!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

The man glared up at her, in no way impressed by this show. He had his kilt and there was no way he was giving it up.

"Ay an' wat of it, bund?"

Which was utterly confusing for Merlin to actually recognize a bit of the accent. "He sounds like he ought to be from Dal Riata."

[thatsamilkshake]

"I don't care if he's from a Mazda Miata!" Look, she was on a roll here. Sense would come later. She shook her finger at the weetiny man. "That's mine. Stealing is bad... and...not very Smurfy!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

That got the small man to pause. "Ye whit? Smarf? Are ye daft, lass?"

[thatsamilkshake]

...Francine turned to Merlin. "Did you get any of that? All I got was lass."

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Even he had to shrug at some of it. "I think he said something about being confused?"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

He stopped his foot. "Nae ey daene! Ey cawed her a daftie!"

[thatsamilkshake]

"Something about an iPod?"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"I have an iPhone," Merlin offered.

The poor man just facepalmed and grumbled something unintelligable.

"Ye goamless weanies."

[thatsamilkshake]

Okay, Francine got that. Or at least she got what she thought that was. "We're weenies? WE don't go around STEALING OTHER PEOPLE'S LINGERIE!" Pause. "AND WEARING IT!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"Linjery?" He asked, proudly smoothing over the fabric of his kilt. "It's cliver, nae?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Wow, she could more or less translate that. "It's women's underwear!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

That got her a long time of staring as if waiting for it to be a joke.

"Arr ye sairious?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine pointed to...well. Herself. Or at least the assets never to be shown off in that underwear again. "I'M THE WOMAN! And you're a pervy, creepy little unsmurfy Smurf!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"En nae a Smarf! We're Picties!"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"I knew it! They are Pixies," Merlin said smugly.

[thatsamilkshake]

"They're blue and they're three apples high. That's smurfy enough for me!" Francine insisted. "Except for the perverted part."

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

"We be Picties, ye pair ah eejits!"

[thatsamilkshake]

"YOU'RE STILL WEARING MY UNDERWEAR!"

Somewhere, she'd lost the ability to smallfont.

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Which is when Merlin had to bring up the scary thing. "...where's the rest of it?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine had to pause at this, and ask herself - aloud - the question that threatened to at least slightly deflate her rage. "...Do we really want to know?"

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

The little man, we'll call him Our John, puffed his little chest out proudly. "We've taen at tae be wit oor Kelda."

She liked pretty things, you know.

[thatsamilkshake]

Yeeeah, that was another one that zoomed straight over Francine's head. "Whatever you did with it, I don't want want it back now." Not after it'd been cut up and made into kilts.

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Hey, Merlin was Irish close enough he ought to understand at least some of that, but...

"They gave it to someone named Kelda?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine put her hands on her hips and stared down at the little man. "Why can't Kelda buy her own lingerie, whoever she is? There's a perfectly good store just down the road."

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Our John was unmoved by this, waving her off as a silly gel.

"Ay daen af time afur ye."

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine had been on the Internet, god help her. She knew These Things. "You're a Furry? Oh God, I don't want to know what you're doing with my clothes, just keep them. Eww, ewww, ewww eww, ewww!"

She turned, prepared to stalk away.